The Fundamental Rule of Water
by the-undefined
Summary: She hated him from the moment he made her miss getting that library book.  That was the same moment he started loving her.  JPxLE  Rated T for slight language and to be safe.


**The Fundamental Rule of Water**

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**Disclaimer:** If I owned this book the story would not revolve around the-boy-who-lived. The story would revolve around the-parents-of-the-boy-who-lived.

**Summary:** She hated him from the moment he made her miss getting that library book. That was the same moment he started loving her. JPxLE Rated for slight language.

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Lily Evans was fuming. Despite the fact that James Potter became a decent bloke last year, that was no reason for him to get the _Head Boy_ position. That should have been reserved for someone who'd been a good student and a role model all their years at Hogwarts. Someone that the younger kids could look up to, admire, respect. Someone like… Amos. Or Remus. They would have been acceptable, expected, welcomed. Instead she got stuck with bloody James Potter, the boy she had just gotten around to being able to stand without completely blowing up. But seeing him 24/7? That could and definitely _would_ reverse that. 

Lily sighed. Of all the luck. He had been such an asshole too. Her mind wandered back to that one incident in 5th year… the last straw…

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_-+-Flashback-+-_

Lily Evans had been hurrying down the corridor to go to the library. She needed one more book for her charms report. Then, her perfectionist persona would stop bugging her and go away. She only hoped that no one else had checked out the library's only copy of _Merryweather's 14__th__ Century Charms for the Advanced Wizard_. She remembered it having a quote that would simply per_fect_ her paper and tie up all the loose ends. But of course, her memory being too frazzled for much thought (she'd stayed up the last few nights on her near perfect paper) she couldn't remember the exact quote. So she had to go back to get that book in order to find that quote.

There was briefly the thought that the corridors seemed all _too_ quiet but she shrugged it off, letting it flit in her head and then out again. If the Marauders (as they liked calling themselves) had taken to raiding the kitchen this time around rather than annoying her (and there was one in particular who adored harassing her) then she wouldn't protest. Though she felt sorry for the house elves, it was after all, survival of the fittest. They could fend for themselves.

Really it was so frustrating. Remus was the only nice one of the bunch. Peter was creepy, Sirius was a player, and Potter? Don't even get her started on Potter. The problem with Potter was that he got good enough grades to be a nice kid and yet he constantly felt the need to be horrid. Perhaps that was the fault of his being a jock. Almost all jocks were jerks she seemed to notice. Except perhaps Amos. But then Amos was an exception to a lot of rules. He was perfect. Couldn't have too many of those people now could you? The world would stop sucking and if the world stopped sucking it would overexert itself and implode. And that wouldn't bode too well for its inhabitants now would it?

She hurried along and out into the courtyard. Despite the nice weather, no one seemed to be about. It was strange. Usually the courtyard was bustling with activity or at least with one or two couples making out on one of the benches giving Lily a queasy feeling. (Whether that was because they disgusted her or because she was jealous she still didn't know.) But now it was strangely empty. Perhaps they were all cramming their reports in last minute before the weekend. Serves them right, leaving it off to the last moment like they did. Now if only she could get that book her life would be brilliant.

As she paused to take that thought in, she heard a faint whisper that sounded a bit like the word 'Now!' but it also could've been 'Meow!' She couldn't hear it too well. And then James bloody Potter stepped out into the open, tossed her one of his fatal smirks and yelled,

"Augmenti!"

And thus she became soaked with water.

Well so what? It's just a little water. It wasn't a big deal. Oh but it was. That water forced her to go back to the dorm to change (because Madam Pince would _not_ allow her in the library soaking wet) and when she went back to the library her book was already checked out AND she caught a cold from said water AND it ruined her new shirt AND her charms paper got a 98. Ok so the 98 wasn't a big deal. Except it meant that Remus was now first in the class (with his stupid 99.98). And she had liked her 100 average more than the 99.97 she now had. It was a much evener and prettier number (was evener even a word?). And it was all JAMES BLOODY POTTER's fault.

You know what else? After he soaked her, he gaped at her like a fish, Sirius popped out of nowhere to snap a picture and then Sirius tugged James away who was still gaping. Who the hell pulls a prank and then stands at the scene of the crime in an obvious fashion as if waiting for the person they terrorized to terrorize back? Which she would have if she hadn't run back up to the dorms to change. She worried for months about that picture. It was probably a form of mental torture that they were working on applying.

_-+-End Flashback-+-_

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Yes he had matured slightly. But she still held a slight grudge for that incident. And who on earth decides to ask someone out the day after they do something like that? James Potter apparently. Funny joke Potter. Or at least at it had seemed. Only problem was, he wouldn't _stop_ asking her. Even when he was decent he just wouldn't stop. Of course, he tried to make them less frequent now that they verged on being friends but it seemed like something he was just compelled to do. And it always hurt slightly more to turn him down as a near-acquaintace-almost-friend. But it couldn't be helped. She just didn't like him in that way. And besides, it was a stupid crush anyway. He'd get over it.

She was in a particularly nasty mood that day. The dreary, rainy, and altogether depressing mood the weather was in only made it worse. Her orange juice had tasted funny, Severus had been downright awful to her (some ex-best friend he was), and exams were coming. And of course there was the small problem of her PMSing state. But that, of course, was only minor.

At the same time, it meant she was in no mood for James Potter and his usual dating antics. So when he asked her for a date that morning, she was compelled to be slightly nasty.

"No Potter." Maybe he'd get the hint and go away.

"Aw Lily, denying your love for me. I find it endearing." Apparently not.

"It's Evans to you Potter."

"It's James to you Lily. And don't be embarrassed by what we have together."

"We have nothing together."

"Oh I believe we do Lily. We have what's called _chemistry_." He wagged his eyebrows at her. Urg. Couldn't be serious ever could he? Couldn't tell she was already pissed off?

"God! Why can't you ever stop being a prat! I've hated you since that stupid water incident! Funny thing is, you can't date someone you hate." She was about to turn away and stalk off in the dramatic fashion that her pissed off state required but his words stopped her.

He was quiet for a moment and said seriously,

"Funny thing is, that was the moment I started loving you."

Of course, she didn't know what to say to that. How do you properly respond to someone who has announced their love for you right after you've announced your hatred of them? So, rather than her dramatic exit, she instead made a wimpy excuse and left as quickly as possible. Simply put, she fled.

Back safely in her room, she reflected. Honestly, where did he get off saying those things? Love? Stupid idiot. He wouldn't know what the word meant. And yet it touched a chord deep within her. The small part of her that wanted someone to love her after her sister's obvious rejection and her parents' need to keep her sister close. That stupid little part of every girl that longed for the romance no matter how illogical or impractical. Stupid idiot. Stupid _wonderful_ idiot. Prat.

She buried her head in her pillow. Ugh. They had to patrol tonight. But she didn't want to face him. That would be so awkward. Besides that, the rain was pounding down hard now and students would definitely be tracking in mud. That in turn would cause Filch to be angry and he'd take it out on them. Even though it wasn't really their fault, they were still supposed to be the 'responsible' ones. Maybe she could fake sick and ask one of the prefects to stand in for her? But that would be avoiding her problems. And Lily Evans never avoided problems. She knew the best way to face them was head on, just like she always told her drama-ridden friends. But she never thought she'd need her own advice.

But patrol time came and things weren't awkward. James was as animated as ever. But how could she doubt it? After all, James Potter was never really awkward. It was part of being popular she supposed. However, her own social status did tend to belie awkwardness. And it frustrated her. He was in the middle of a particularly amusing story about a Divinitations class where Sirius had come in drunk and the teacher had thought him to be under a deep hypnotic trance when she whirled on him.

"How can you be so calm about this?"

"About Sirius? Eh, these types of things are normal with us. Happens all the time. Marauder thing I guess- "

"Not that! The fact that you professed your love and continue to talk to me like nothing happened!"

His bubbly talk ceased and he was quiet an instant. But James Potter was never without words. As he would tell her later, he was only searching for the right ones.

"Lily. I've professed my love for you a dozen times or so and we've always been the same. Why are you being so weird about it now?"

"But you were never_serious_ about it!" Her face had adapted a bewildered look and seemed permanently fixated in that position. His in turn was a serious face that, while seldom seen on James Potter, seemed to be cropping up a lot when he was around Lily.

"Lily. Just because I say it with a smile doesn't mean I'm not being perfectly serious about it." She didn't know how to react to that. It flustered her and completely destroyed the remains of her previously perfect composition.

"But-but-but why?"

"Why what? Why smile?" His voice hinted at slight amusement at her bereaved state.

"No, not that!" She shook her head vigorously. "Why- why love me?"

Again he was silent for a moment. And again he looked at her very seriously.

"I told you. I've loved you from the moment that Augmenti spell hit you. Or did you forget that little incident already?"

How could she? He made it impossible to forget.

"Why then? You'd asked me out once or twice by then." She seemed to be accepting of the fact that he did indeed love her. He let out a noisy sigh.

"I didn't know then if I loved you. My mate Sirius thought it was just a crush. But he swore there was one way to find out." James pinned her down with her stare. "Soak you with water. That way, I would find out what you looked like beneath the makeup-y gook that girls wear. I could see how you really looked. He figured if I saw how 'ugly' –his words not mine—you really were then I'd forget you. It's the 'Fundamental Rule of Water'. A girl generally only looks as good as her makeup. For the same reason, you can apply it to a girl who has just woken up. But seeing as you are the _perfect_ Lily Evans, and get up a bazillion and one hours before me, we doubted we could use that one. So we opted for the water one."

Lily made a noisy sound of disbelief.

"It's true. Don't mock my methods. I was fifteen. It made perfect sense in my hormone-deranged head. And I figured Sirius of all people would know these things. Kinda stupid now that I think about it. Probably should have gone to Remus for this sort of thing. And I'm babbling now."

She gave a little half-grin, partly in amusement and partly because she needed something to fill the space, something to make this less… well whatever it was and more whatever it wasn't. Ugh. Neither of them were making sense now. He continued anyway.

"And you know what I found out then? That you were the most beautiful girl alive. And every bit of knowing you brought me closer to that epiphany. You're beautiful. Inside. _And_ out. I've spent the longest nights just staring at that picture Sirius took. And I knew someday I'd make you mine or die trying." He cracked a grin slightly at the last statement reminiscing on all the times she bashed his head in for asking her out. Worth it though. Every last time. He wouldn't change that for the world.

Lily gave him a quiet contemplative stare. She made a few noises as if contemplating this. Then, (finally!) she spoke.

"Well then." She said.

"Well then? That's it?"

"I suppose there's only one thing to do isn't there?" And she gave him a small smile at that.

"And what's that?" He asked, returning the smile. (How could he help it? She looked so cute.)

She gave a quiet knowing smile and grabbed him by the sleeve, and tugged him outside into the original fateful courtyard. She stared for a few seconds and cocked her head to the side as she quietly contemplated him. Her eyebrow furrowed and she bit her lip. All the while rain poured down on them. Then, her eyes lit up in that gorgeous way of hers when she had come to a conclusion she knew was right and she grinned again.

"And you look pretty gorgeous yourself." And with that, she kissed him.

Three thoughts ran through his mind: First, that he was pretty sure the water rule only applied to girls to which he would indignantly say he most certainly was NOT. Second, rain wasn't exactly the same as water. Well, it was a _form_ of water in condensation but it had loads of other crap like man-made chemicals. Third, that after years and years of pining and plotting, he was finally, _finally_ kissing Lily Evans. And it was pretty damn awesome.

Thus she had gotten a cold from the rain AND soaked her favorite sweater (which then shrank in the wash), AND got yelled at by Filch when the two of them tracked mud back inside.

But so what? It was only a little water.

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**Author's note:**Alright so I was talking with a couple of guy friends and they were totally discussing the possibility of doing this to figure out how pretty this one girl was. I told them they better wait till summer or she'd get a cold. But still… that turned the cogs in my little head and viola! Haha. Well it was an amusing piece to write anyway. Erm…. Sorry about the excessive fluff/sappiness? 

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